Thread: my first post
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Old 09-18-2015, 09:33 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
SparkleKitty
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Chicago
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Congratulations on your 2 months, Gonzo, that is terrific!

For loved ones of addicts, trust is an extremely difficult commodity to regain once lost. If she is keeping her distance now, it is because her experience is telling her not to get too close or to lead you to have expectations of her or of a future relationship that she cannot guarantee right now.

It will take TIME for her to see and believe in the changes you are making. You can't rush it, force it, or make it happen. Any energy you spend focused on her, what she is doing, what she is thinking, or what will happen is FAR better invested in your own recovery.

No one can guarantee that if you do X, Y, and Z you two will end up together. You may, you may not. Sometimes you really have to let go of someone you love so that you both can become people who are capable of healthy, loving partnerships. You may or may not have those partnerships with each other. Accepting this fact will give you the emotional freedom to focus on maintaining your sobriety and building your recovery.
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