help
I´m having an extreamly hard time in accepting myself right now. After 5 years clean of heroine and cocaine (my drugs of choice) i again started to have feelings of anxsiety and fear facing my responsabilities in life. I´m feeling weak and i want to use drugs. I´m totally panniking, i never expected to feel like this at this time of my life, when everything seemed to be so fine. Do i have to finally accept that my addiction will stay in my life forever?... Even with family and friends i can not talk about this easily, because all of them expect me to be doing okay after so long. I admit, i though that too, but how are this feelings coming back? Should i be aware of anything that may had happened that brought me back to that way i was feeling before? Please, somebody help me, i´m just so affraid i can go and use drugs again and destroy my life. I´m desperate, the anxsiety follows me every where, i dream with drugs and i can´t keep myself concentrated.