Glad to hear things are a bit better Mariah. Hope you sleep well.
Obo, what a relief that must be, to have made a decision to move to pastures new.
It's interesting that when we get sober we find that the real work begins! I've been helped greatly by Eckhart Tolle's work, he speaks about the "pain body", and this really resonates with me. Practicing awareness and presence is the corner stone of my own healing, and I've not been taken over by my "pain body" for many months now (I'm not saying it won't happen, but I think I will see it coming first). I know you've had quite a bit of experience with various spiritual traditions, is there one which you think might be helpful for you now?
My Ego still shows itself frequently, and I can smile at it and just observe without getting too embroiled with its perspective on things. Things I used to get nervous about, are no longer quite so threatening. I definitely don't worry quite so much about things. Please don't think I've got this cracked though, I still have a long way to go, but these are just observations from my own practice.
It's Friday, so I'm in for the weekend bargain!