Originally Posted by
JL2014 
I think alcohol keeps me so fragmented mentally, like I'll think of something productive or have a good idea then poof. Can't remember it. I hate that.
I really need to write stuff down
Stay strong JL. I've been where you are, and I know how much it sucks. But your attitude will improve in a few days.
If you aren't aware of this book, I recommend
Kick the Drink . . . Easily, by Jason Vale. It explains how almost all our ideas about alcohol are illusions and misconceptions. It has really help change my attitude about drinking, to the point that right now, I have little to no desire to drink.