Your are so right Ileana. I think that is what makes detachment so difficult for mother's. The bond with our children is nearly impossible to weaken. Detachment seems like a complete severing of that bond. But over time, we realize the detachment is from the addiction not from the loved one. I have said over and over to myself and to my Nate, " I will no longer participate in your addiction." I have other children who lead normal, sober lives. When they ask for help I willingly give it to them. The help they need is not the result of an addiction. When my son needs help it is always the result of his addiction. So, there you have it.........detachment is not helping the addict with anything he should do himself. Love him.....hate the addiction!