I followed my sponsors directions.I worked a lot,80 plus hours a week.I made time to do the directions he gave me.It is a life and death matter.
I got up a little earlier and did what it took to get thru those steps.I wanted to live so I did what I had too
if you are writing out your 4th step and "still on your own plan,and going in your own direction",I would say you are heading towards failure or at least a extremely difficult time.I am a alcoholic and cannot manage my own life.That was true as I went thru the steps.I did them the way my sponsor wanted me too,not the way I wanted too.
It was a very good way to practice giving up our selfish will.I also found out I cannot manage my sobriety no more than I managed my drunkenness.
The best thing I can do is follow my sponsors directions,the big book and pray as I go asking for His help and His truth.
I suggest you get up with your sponsor and do what she suggests,when she suggests it and how she suggests it.
Don`t take off on your own doing things your way.God will provide you a way and the Power like He did me,but trusting and relying in Him are essentials at this point
best wishes to you on your journey