How's it going right now MindRacer? I've been thinking of you all day. I hope you can find the strength to get going on this journey. I'm still at the beginning myself, but all the stories of success here show me that it is definitely worth fighting for. And really, could sobriety be any worse than being constantly drunk and hungover, miserable, tired, depressed and self-loathing? I'm pretty sure it has to be even just a little better, but my guess is it is a lot better.
Do check in here. Reach out for face to face support as well. You are not alone and there are tons of people who understand what you are going through.