Hi Willow, I am so sorry you are feeling so down. I know what that feels like, to feel like you have disappointed a loved one.
A couple of things, one, you need to understand that his anger is probably coming from a place of worry and care. If you can try to accept that and realize he has a right to be angry. Two, think about what you have done as a result of the disease you have, not as a character flaw. Three, start making a plan for change. Just declaring "I won't drink ever again" doesn't cut it with many people, I know it sure didn't for me! Think about what you can do to work towards that goal of not drinking. Lastly, I would suggest trying to have a talk with your husband. Be prepared for the fact that he may not be able to understand everything you are saying or feeling, but at least let him know that you know he is angry, you know why, you agree that what you have done/are doing is unhealthy and you do not want to continue that way and maybe try to work on a plan together.
Keep your chin up. YOu are not a bad person, you are just an alcoholic. They are two different things.