Cricket, thank you for sharing the blog. Like others have said: Relationships _should_ be 50/50, or pretty darn close, for responsibility, accountability, input of energy, caring and nurturing for the relationship. However, when there’s addiction or abuse, it gets skewed in a really wonky way.
It’s kind of like having only one fully functioning string in the set on a mini-blind: the blind isn’t going to lift or lower evenly at all, even if the other string in the set works some of the time. Pulling on that one working string harder isn’t going to even anything out. And while that string could move its section of the blinds to reach the point everything is all level, it’s not that string’s fault that the blinds aren’t level at any other point.
Dear Cricket, it’s not your fault your STBXAH didn’t pull his weight in the relationship. It’s not your fault that he’s being a schmuck through the divorce process. I think it’s awesome that you stood up for yourself with your counselor.
And, if you feel like you’re not ready to date, you’re not ready. No one’s opinion on that subject should matter than your own. (Heck, your divorce isn’t even final yet.)
((((hugs))))