Yes there is no reason why you can't see your family and deal with your mother. I suggest working on detaching from your mom and let your boundary be that she isn't allowed to upset you.
I suppose that sounds a little ridiculous, but that is a boundary I have with my own mother and it works. Not an alcoholic, but for reasons too lengthy to explain, that boundary has to be there when she goes into her black cloud days. I don't get sucked into conversations that will end bad. Often times I just let her say what she wants to say and I say nothing but "hmmm" or "ok".
And my father will bitch about my mother until my ears bleed. Its not all the time, just during the black cloud days. And yes he will also say something nasty and then kiss her butt as soon as the door opens. So I also have a boundary with him 'I don't want to hear it". Took a couple of times but now he doesn't say anything about her anymore.
Good luck with this there are ways to handle it. As for wanting to scream at her a punching bag works (or a pillow just make sure its not feathers
). Not kidding.