You can absolutely blame someone else - many of us did for years...
But it doesn't get you anywhere.
If I was in early recovery trying hard not to drink and I was meeting someone in a bar setting, someone I'd probably drunk with before and who didn't know I had a problem...
the likely outcome is pretty flippin' obvious.
I needed to take responsibility for my own life and my own choices.
Noone is going to look out for you better than you can yourself EP.
Right or wrong, fair or not, that is the bottom line.
We have to be our own best advocate.
If doing that, I tick off a guy (who's really a bit of a jerk anyway) and he never calls me again, what exactly have I lost?
D