I'm with Dee on this - I didn't look at it so much as accepting that I am an alcoholic as realizing I can never be the person I want to be if I drink.
Plus maybe running out of fancy new ideas of how to control it so it wasn't a problem. None of them ever worked. It was always a problem when I drank. It will always be a problem when I drink. I'm an average thinker on a good day, but I can figure out how to be rid of THAT problem.
All of us against the addiction. Welcome back to the fight.
