butterfly.........STOP IT. honey you have covered this same ground over and over and over and it gets you NOWHERE. you might as well just cut and paste the post from last week or the week before.
LET.IT.GO. you re-engaged with this person for about 4 nanoseconds. you are in NO condition (emotionally, mentally, spiritually) to try to be "friends" with any man. you CRAVE male attention and validation, which is NOT what friendship is about. he will NEVER be able to meet your needs because they are legion right now.
you are still looking outward. it has been advised here multiple times that you must look INWARD. basically in recovery we learn to get OVER ourselves.....we have these huge needy egos that must be brought down to right size. we need to learn GRATITUDE and HUMILITY. (not humiliation).
your circular thinking is exactly the same as it was with your ex. it doesn't matter WHO the other person is, or what THEY do, you will never feel it is enough.....never feel complete. your boat has a hole in the hull and it is up to YOU to fix it. adding another body to the boat just causes it to sink FASTER.
get to shore, get the boat in drydock and start making repairs.