Venecia I agree, I think part of what you said is maybe bordering on self compassion which is a Buddhist idea I am trying to remind myself of doing.
davaidavai, well said. You really put it into words, I am the same! I actually prefer to be around people because I love to learn about them and their lives and stories, it's like I am still learning about the world this way. And yet I have every reason to never want to talk to another person again, it's really twisted up in my desire to be around others and intense anxiety over humiliation and criticism which I had heaps of for over half my life by peers as well as family.
And no matter the intelligence level, these are not things everyone can understand- I swear I said this very thing to my boyfriend today.
And it can really, really lonely because of that.