Originally Posted by
Refiner 
I know it hurts now, but I hope you get over him fairly quickly and am just glad it didn't drag on for longer for you. He sounds pretty dang immature, probably best to let him cut his teeth on other "girls" more his age with more immaturity themselves.
Thank you! I keep doing what I tried to do with my axbf, namely remember the things that annoyed me. It's a bit more difficult in this case, but I had had moments in which I wondered about his level of empathy and other things. I think he has some narcissistic traits (he is not a narcissist per se, but thinks VERY highly of himself and lacks a certain humility).
I have realized about myself that I have much more confidence these days. I don't care who this other woman is. In earlier times I would have agonized and tortured myself over her possibly being younger, prettier, thinner, etc. I am dealing with this break-up much better than with a very similar one 10 years ago during which I was absolutely devastated, obsessive, and stalkerish (online) for months. This time I defriended him on Facebook right after he told (more to deny him access to my life that I know he still wanted, but also to keep myself safe). I don't ask people what he might post and largely try not to think of him. It does hurt, but I learn about myself that I have grown a lot into myself over the years.
It seems so trivial in light of what people here go through and what I myself have gone through in the past. But I think when you experience this light-hearted carefree happiness for the first time in so long and it gets ripped away with no warning, it's a very intense pain in its own right.