Originally Posted by
NeoGuest 
Thanks guys I am going to look in to rational recovery and get some sober plan together.. I can stop for a few days and hate the thought of drinking then something in me switches and I am obsessed till I get drinking..why can't I hate it all the time..
Everyone feels this way, especially at the beginning. The first few days the feelings of why I hate drinking are fresh and easy to remember. Once the shame starts wearing off it's all "Well, it wasn't that bad. Plus since I stopped for a few days I must not have a problem!" and it starts all over again. I've found that the longer I'm sober (I think I'm on day 45?) the less I have those feelings of wanting to drink. I don't think they'll ever completely go away, but I'm much better at dealing with them.
People on here always say "They're just feelings, you don't have to act on them" and that helps me. Sometimes I feel like screaming at my boss, but I don't do that. Sometimes I feel like spending all of my savings on something stupid, and I don't do that. So why do I need to drink when I feel like I want to? The simple answer is, you don't.
AA seemed to help me, but I also tried every possible recovery method, and just stuck with what seemed to work best. I say try everything available to you.. AA, AVRT, SR, online meetings, even church. See what works for you and stick with it.