Yeah thomas I hate it and love it at the same time. The worst part is my constant struggle to try to control it despite more than a decade of evidence that I can't.
So yeah quitting forever is the way to go. Just let it go and move on.
I'm still scared but I'm trying not to future trip and I think that's important, it's best to just stay in the moment. Like freshstart said, I never drink NOW. My commitment is forever but forever is always in each moment. It's the ultimate head game. lol
I felt anxious and sad last night.... I had a little cry but I feel better today. Lighter. I can do this.