Thank you Dee & Fini,
I needed that. I was very worried about the all inclusive resort and we debated Walt Disney World but it was the cheapest option to be on the sands of Jamaica (our dream) and have scuba, horseback riding, dinner, etc all included as well. You guys are very correct. I do need to focus on the NOW and myself. I guess I set myself up for disaster all the time because I don't want people to 1) know about my problem 2) my problem to affect other people. My future husband knows the extent of my problem but honestly enables me as well. Ie, he will get me more to drink if I am hungover because he hates seeing my detoxing. Its a messed up situation. I can totally see my wedding night being the same. I just really need to focus on my sobriety NOW and focus on a sober amazing wedding day.