Ihatealcohol......you may well be logical....but, I can tell, just from what you have posted that you are also ignorant.....ignorant of this disease of alcoholism.....and, also ignorant of what constitutes enabling----and, you sure do sound like a well=meaning person---but, an enabler, non the less.
Not your fault....your ignorance....or, lets say "lack of knowlege and non-acquaintence with the facts".
Very few people are familiar with the workings of this disease---unless they have a good reason to learn (like you do now).
Most of what masqurades on the streets as fact is really myth and urban legends.
For the above reasons, I plead with you to use every spare minte that you have while she is still in rehab to read everything in the "classic Readings" that are on the fron page of this section. (the Stickies).
Also, the "classic" book on co-dependency---titled:
"Co-dependent No More" is the basic starting point for most, around here.
Now, I know that I probably sound like a mean old witch to you.....lol!
That is o.k.
If you think I am bad---I am a sweet whisper compared to what this disease will do to you if you don't get educated and prepared for what is to come.
Also---You might want to drop in on a few OPEN AA meetings. That can be a real eye opener.....
Peace Out....
dandylion