thomas11

Some of you may know that I have a small business, it is construction related. My guys shower after work, not before. Drinking is prevalent and everywhere. I hired a guy this spring, 27 years old and has a longtime girlfriend. His prior job was folding linens at a hotel for minimum wage (nothing wrong with that), but he apparently was always broke, behind on bills etc...he grew up in a farming community and was familiar with hard work. So he decided he was going to make a run at doing a much harder job and making a livable wage. Very pleasant and polite young man, and willing to learn. But I sensed something was a bit off with him. On two different occasions I gave him very clear instructions and his response was something like "yeah, that sounds like good advice, I'll keep that in mind". When we got back to the truck I told him nicely that what I had told him was not advice but rather instructions on how it needs to be done. I try not to be a jerk, but when I give a clear directive, I expect the response to be "ok" or "no problem Jeff". Period. So we had a stretch of rain and I texted the guys we would start at 7AM Monday. He texts back that he won't be there. I asked why as I don't recall him telling me he needed the time off. He said he was camping. Now, this guy was so broke, on his first day of work I had to give him company gas to put in his car so he had enough to get home. But now he apparently has enough money not only to not work, but to go camping as well. So then came a drunk text or two and I think in his own twisted logic he though he was going to teach me a lesson that I needed him more than he needed me. Wrong answer. There was about two days of incommunicado. I was in the hospital at this time. Then come the texts asking how I'm doing etc...being Mr. nice guy. I did not respond, then came more drunk texts in which he was just being a fool, he called and texted me at the hospital until 1AM, even called the hospital to see if I was still there, I wasn't. I had been transferred to the rehab facility. This pissed me off, the one text I sent him was that when I got out we would talk and I would make a determination on his future employment. He sent some smart-ass text back, and then on and on, ending with something like I'll work for you if, but I gotta think about it and by the way, I would want a significant increase in pay. I sent him his last check and that was the end of that.

This week: I hired a guy about a month ago who is part of our extended family on my father's side. A struggling/recovering alcoholic, 44 years old, no license etc... I gave him an opportunity on a silver platter, hoping this would provide him motivation to start improving his life. He had been sober for quite awhile with the occasional 1-2 day relapse. When I was in the hospital, he was a no-call no-show for 2 days (relspsed). I can't do much as I was in the hospital pretty out of it on pain meds. When I got out I told him I understood, sh*t happens, but it can't happen again. I rather harshly told him I run a business not a daycare and you are an adult. This is an opportunity for you, take advantage of it. I shared some of my mishaps and offered all the encouragement I could. Well, this week he went off the rails. Full blown relapse. I knew something was up. He called the first morning, said he stepped on some glass, needed to go to doc, get tetanus shot etc..I gave him the benefit of the doubt and told him to take care of himself, keep me informed. Next day, I texted no response, called no answer, no return call. Yesterday, no-call no-show. My decision was made, I'd have to let him go. This morning I called his mother, even though I didn't totally know 100% for sure what was going on, she confirmed the worst. He had relapsed hard, and its not over. He was wondering the streets in the middle of the night, got the living hell beat out of him and ended up in the hospital, got out and started drinking again. SOMEHOW, the law didn't not get involved and so there are no strikes against his current probation status. Of course I had to tell her that I have to let him go and in fact have already replaced him. That was hard, he is family. I mentioned this website and gave her the address, told her how much it has helped me. She wrote it down and when he comes out of it, she's gonna refer him to it. Can't hurt. She held it together for about 15-20 minutes and then began to cry and said she had to go.

So, my point in sharing this is that we all know alcohol is a demon. And it ruins so many people's lives, even when given opportunities to straighten out. But we all know that. Their lives won't get straightened out either until they are ready, they obviously aren't ready. Thanks for reading, appreciate any thoughts on the situation and whether I handled it properly.

ps. 27 days for me.