Hobbers, welcome back! As soon as you have some sober time in, you will not deal with shame and anxiety. Eventually drinking will not occupy your thoughts, and you will feel pride, comfort, security and your sense of humor, fun -side, whatever, will gradually come back. You will enjoy social gatherings because your mind will not be pre-occupied with alcohol.
I tried moderation many times - it works for a short time, then you are right back into the cycle of looking forward to a drink/getting drunk/getting through a hangover/looking forward to a drink.
Stay with SR; like Pink, I would never have gotten this far without the help of the wonderful people in this August team.
Let's keep on keeping on. #NO SAUSAGES !