Spot on from everyone.
In my experience, the habits, behaviors, self-esteem issues & lack of motivation that go hand in hand with addiction will plague the addict for life.
That doesn't, though, make any of it an excuse. It may be a reason for their actions, but it's no excuse.
My exAH has no idea how to tell the truth. He cannot take responsibility for himself. He is incapable of holding a job...he would really rather be on unemployment perpetually & pretend that his record & his past are to blame. He resents anyone who tries to tell him otherwise. His ego is huge & his self-confidence is virtually nonexistent.
The entire reason that I want to get a divorce is that being married to him is like raising an infant/baby with a petulant teenage boy-his maturity level when faced with being held accountable is exactly that low.
avoidance is ALWAYS easier. That's why things are so hard on those of us here on SR-on some level we've all chosen to confront addiction & its consequences head on.
Unfortunately that also means, for a lot of us, facing the fact that our addict will not.