Day 3 almost in the books! Feeling better. Had a little issue with my husband tonight..it highlights some issues which I think may be a cause for my overdoing it with drinking. When I drink I feel like I let go..like I'm free. So my husband picked me up from work. I informed him that I would need to travel for work several times over the next few months. As usual, he got upset bc me traveling means he will be home alone. He wasn't pleased. Then he took me to an eye dr appt. I decided to get contacts, never had them but wanted to try them. He got upset because I didn't talk to him about it first. On the way he home he started going off. He was saying that I got contacts bc I want to look prettier. Then he brought up Saturday night. Saturday night we went out to a bar and we both overdid it. He brought up a situation with an older guy. I do tend to get flirty when i drink too much but I was really careful. When we go out like that my husband leaves me alone at the bar when he goes out to smoke. When he is gone I talk to people around me at the bar. I struck up a conversation with this older man but, as I recall, it was harmless. Anyway later that night this man approached my husband and asked if he could dance with me. He called me by my first name. My husband flipped his lid. We ended up leaving. Tonight he says to me "I don't think you remember half the things you do". He's right. I do remember Saturday night though and I remember my conversation with that guy. It was harmless. Then my husband tells me that he's concerned about this coming weekend. I'm going to Florida for a girls weekend with my daughters. He said he's worried that my daughters are going to pressure me into drinking. The truth is I don't drink with anyone else but my husband. I know I'm venting here. I'm probably not really explaining what's going on. But there are times when I feel paralyzed. Things are all twisted up and there are so many mixed messages.