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Old 05-30-2015, 12:20 PM
  # 318 (permalink)  
brynn
...holds the key
 
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Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Do you take Dudley for walks, GS?

Y'all, Sorry to go on about this but this debate in my head about tonight is driving me nuts! And the thing is.....I'm not supposed to be debating stuff like this! I took drinking off the table as an option in December! The last few days I've been really bombarded with thoughts of drinking and now maybe I'm using playing poker tonight as an excuse to drink ?!?! And this is awful but I keep telling myself that if I choose to drink it's all on me....not a relapse, not a slip, but a pre-meditated choice.....like that somehow makes it better....more responsible somehow! I know it sounds ridiculous and looks ridiculous written down like that but it makes perfect sense in my head. Sometimes I wish someone would knock me unconscious!
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