I am using collaboration to try to stay out of court (really can't afford the $50k + it would cost and may be counterproductive). I prefer this to mediation as we both have our lawyers with us during the meetings. I'm meeting with my lawyer tomorrow so may get a better sense of things, but I don't find she is tough. Thing is, collaboration is supposed to be about working things out and getting an agreement so I am trying to stay calm and not be antagonistic. He has the law on his side - he is entitled legally to half, even though it is ethically unfair. If we went to court, the likely outcome would be they would say sell the house and split the money in half. I am hoping to argue for fairness but I feel like he has the power here as the law is on his side. As for the house he bought, it was after the separation, and my issues are - where did he get the deposit as his account shows very little in it and I think he has been hiding money, and also the deceitfulness of wanting to keep it secret.