Well, Al-Anon is a different animal than SR. Generally, people posting here are looking for feedback, which would be considered cross-talk in an Al-Anon meeting.
Were you to bring this up with an Al-Anon member, outside the context of the meeting, you might hear similar suggestions--that you keep the focus on you and not on him. I didn't see anything heavy-handed in any of the posts, just suggestions of the kinds of things that have worked for us.