BlueChair,
before i went to my first LR meeting i thought just as you did.
it's not til i went that i could know the difference f2f makes.
and i was only going to go once; in fact, i was terrified to walk into a room of strangers but real live people (hoping they were all strangers and that i didn't know anyone and, more to the point, that nobody know ME!) and by doing that "admit" to real live people that i had a "problem with alcohol". even though i knew in LR there was no expectation i'd label myself in any way.
the very fact i found it so overwhelmingly scary told me how different it is.
i knew i needed to make myself go just once, in order to acknowledge to myself on a different level my "condition".
turns out i loved it! soooo helpful. went once a week for a couple of years; such a relief!
still friends with one guy, years later. we're having coffee tomorrow. we probably won't speak about LR or alcoholism at all, but it is a part of our understanding of each other and makes for a different , trusting relationship.