Couldn't sleep so I thought I'd give these boards one more visit.
Thanks for your honesty JL. Sorry you're hurting but glad you came in here to talk about it instead of acting on it by drinking. This addiction sucks. It's crazy how much that stupid liquid affects our bodies and minds even when we're not ingesting it any more. You're recognizing a pattern in your moods. That's a good starting place to being able to change them.
I've got those patterns myself. I know that days 7-11 are usually killers for me, so my plan this time was to hang around here like crazy during those days. It worked this time. I've got another of those previous repetitive danger zones coming up in about a week or so, so I need to start planning now what I'm going to do if those desires to drink and those mood swings start flaring up.
I like your idea of getting a board to be able to really visualize your sobriety plan. I encourage you to keep venting when you need to. Being honest is a great tool in itself. No one in here expects you or anybody else to be positive all the time. This is a deadly addiction and depression and emotional ups and downs are a very real side effect of it. I've been keeping an ongoing document on my computer desktop where I cut and paste any good recovery or mindfulness techniques that I run across on this board. It's growing all the time and is basically a toolbox for me to open up anytime I start feeling off.
I think I'm just rambling but main point is I'm glad you posted and I'm sorry you're hurting. We've all been there before and will probably be there again, but I'm proud of you for stepping up and being honest in here about how things are going. Hang in there buddy, I'll be praying for you.