Good morning Undies
I can be a good sport while people around me are drinking for only so long. When it becomes white knuckling, such as when being privy to it every day, I find that's not a very fulfilling way to live.
I don't know what the right answer is for those of us in recovery who are trying to find our way through life surrounded by our partners, families and friends who drink, whether normally or to excess.
I feel detached at times from people in my life. Last night I hung out with my regular crowd. The night stated out good, but as people got drunker, their behavior deteriorated to the point where it was just sad. Yet all those folks will look back on last night as having so much fun, and will want to do it again next weekend.
Someone at AA shared about the challenge of trying to fit to his old life with friends who drink/use when he became a nondrinker. It's not easy facing facts that many people in my life, while sweet and nice, smart and funny, and successful, are above all drinking/using buddies who have no interest in this new chapter I'm writing. I've mourned that loss a lot over the past 14+ months. Now I need to move on, let my recovery guide me, live my truth, enjoy my life, and accept where it takes me.
Today it got me out of bed early for a 2 mile walk/run, huge cup of coffee, a quiet morning reading alongside my two kids, a chance to wrap my head around a couple of issues, and a list of a few things for me to do to make the most of today.
Have a great day Undies!!