Fini, haha yeah. You know what I mean though. In the past I have kind of kept the future unwritten as far as committing to a program and really admitting my addiction. This time it just really feels like I am finished. I hope it's real.
I feel, for the first time in my life, like I actually have a reason to live. Or something lose. Over the past year, I have barely drunk, lost like 30 pounds, and started a decent job. Having experienced long-term depression (started SSRIs at 16) this year has been the most progressive in terms of having joy and happiness in my life. Living for the simple things and working hard. I've really tried to be a kind person. It's bewildering how absolutely all of that goes away in a night of drinking.
I am ready to take this on. I know I will need a lot of help and I will try to stay active here and contribute.