Thanks everyone. One of my first thoughts during my confused initial state was - I have to tell my SR crew
So.... now I kind of want to email back. I know, ME. I just want to email back a subject heading of:
"Glad to hear it."
With no body, and keep the email address blocked so I can't get any response.
Full disclosure - the day after i posted this thread, my aunt emailed me and said that she suspects my mother is disinheriting me to leave everything to that family friend who backstabbed me when things fell apart last year. i don't really CARE about the money thing - i'm kind of resigned on that point - and emotionally i'm in a place of self-care that i really need to not be thinking about whether or not my mother is disowning me. i've already disowned her!
The reasons TO send the simple 'glad to hear it' email are: I basically think she's a sick person who has had a really awful life and is ending it as awfully as much of it was lived. She is a damaged person who experienced a tremendous amount of trauma and therefore was not capable of raising a daughter entirely lovingly - she WAS loving sometimes - it was the times when she wasn't.... So to that damaged person who is alone and twice widowed whose daughter won't even speak to her, am I strong and compassionate enough to send a simple "Glad to hear it." (in response to the 'i am doing well' whether or not that is even true, not being the point)
Reasons NOT to - i might dwell on what her response will be even if i never hear about it... i might not be doing it for the 'right' reasons... i might be doing it out of guilt or codie manipulation/control instead of actual compassion and letting-go-iness... and mostly, it breaks the rule of No Contact i made for myself less than a year ago.
Another reason to: now, I can say 'glad to hear it' in response to something; a year from now she may be dead, or i might want to say something like 'hope you are well' without having to feel like i'm starting a conversation. this way, i'm just responding, and leaving it at that.
Thoughts?