Originally Posted by
martina12 
Yeah I had those too when XAH left..pretty similar things like he cut off the £ into our joint account for bills about 3 weeks after moving out, cut off the subscription to the Sky tv package etc etc...sigh. Luckily I have a good enough job to cover everything.
I got to the point where I had a new motto..'no contact=no pain' still haven't sorted things out but maintaining sobriety is my number one priority...that's just me anyway.
Stay strong Zab
Hey there M,
I am lucky enough that I am the major breadwinner. I could have been just as childish and cut her medical aid, car insurance and cell phone etc. If I did that - I would be defeating the point of recovery.
If it must end - I walk away with a clear conscience. I do not need anything that I would live to regret or have remorse over by my sober behaviour. One less trigger that way.
I am sorry to hear that you are in a similar situation with your XAH. It is not easy, but it is also not undoable. The thing for me is to stay sober, and to do that I cannot stoop to petty childish shite. My decisions must be mine and mine alone, not influenced by people that sit around and are now experts in everything, but have never experienced it.
You stay strong too, it does get easier as you go along. The surprises have to run out eventually.
Take care,
ZAB
P.S. What does XAH stand for?