Pleasehelpmeout, good job on coming back here and for realizing you need to quit. It took me 20+ years of heavy drinking before I decided to quit. By that time, I was diagnosed with fatty liver disease, was drinking over a case of beer each day or a box of wine a day, had been on blood pressure meds since 29, was overweight, had a bright red face 24/7. I too was killing myself, but didn't know how to stop!
You do have the power to quit. Like other's have said, quitting is tough and your body will go through major adjustments; both mentally and physically. You've got to be 100% committed, make a plan, stick close to your support group(s), etc.
For me, SR is the only support group I use. Early on, I was online as much as I could be each day and night. It helped me tremendously to be active here.
You will learn and adjust to sobriety with time. Trust me, I didn't think I would be happy without booze, but the opposite happened... I am happier now than I have been in years. Life still has its ups and downs, but you will enjoy all of the simple things more. No more anxiety about drinking, your health will improve; I was able to go off of my BP meds with about 4 months sober time, liver made a full recovery, lost 30 lbs...
You can do this. It will be an adjustment, but you can make it and all of the effort is so worth the outcome! Trust me and others on this, but you have to put forth the effort to make it through to see those benefits.
Lean on this group as much as you need. We are here to help each other.