Jeff is my good friend, we talk outside of Sober Recovery. What I did in the past wasn't so much of a a stunt. It was a situation I didn't know how to back out of, I never knew so many were following my story at some juncture I wanted people to feel like I was making progress because I was asking for help. Long over in my mind, but if it offends or someone is harboring anger I understand. I've long apologized for it, but if you or anyone would like to talk to me about it privately I will. I am not a bad guy, I don't bite I promise I am nice.
The counselor and psychiatrist are working with. The current problem revolves around eliminating symptoms and also have a good quality of life. Olanzapine has a history of putting people to sleep. Without it I hear #$#@ that doesn't exist, even with it I need a certain dose or I still have problems. Thats all being played with, and I suppose we will find a median.
Actually despite much of what is said in my threads, or what you might here, I want to stop. I post here as a form of support I am far from a perfect individual. I am a bit off, medicated Jeremy and unmedicated Jeremy are different folks, as is drinking jeremy and sober Jeremy or acid Jeremy.
I've posted with every Jeremy, actually there is one post out there where I was extremely drunk and high and asked for it to be removed but it still exist.
What I expect from posting here. Support here, a ear to listen, someone that knows my story and tells me hey look you gotta do this... I don't always listen, I know that, everyone here knows that.
Outside of SR, I gotta say most think I am off a bit. I am strange, I am a oddity of sorts in person. I hang out in my apartment, Melissa ( my wife) and I watch lots of documentaries and I love reading and writing. I post a lot of writings anonymously online, I don't want credit I just like seeing the accolades.
I find support with a close nit group of friend I've developed online. They all know my back story, and all have forgiven me.
You spoke of hope, I don't know what it is I am hoping for, I guess an ear a person someone to relate too, also someone might be reading and say I hey I did all of that stuff, and I am schizophrenic I am not alone.
From a professional standpoint, I am on a lot of peoples radars. The state mental hospitals, CPS, private docs, monitored by my wife. There is a lot of contact, I just do my thing, you know I a bit paranoid and stuff.