Thanks getright15, good luck on your sobriety. I hope you are working a 12 step program and are dedicated to it.
For today's entertainment my wife has sent me two hate filled emails before 9am today, followed up by a hate filled text. She is mad at just about anything I say or do. I asked her if I could come to the house and get the lawnmower to cut the grass at the lake. When she wouldn't respond I just made sure to take care of that yesterday when I was with the kids. I would have rather done it tomorrow instead and focused my time and attention on my kids. It turned out OK and it is done.
So today she sent me an awful email about how it is my job to cut the grass and that she had been willing to do it but since I was so mean to her I have to do it. I had offered to show her how to use the mower, it is a zero turning mower and it a little tricky to learn how to use. The one time I tried to teach her before she was drunk and almost ran over my feet. My thought process on her learning how to use it is because she will probably end up with our house, I am becoming OK with that, it is just a material object and can be replaced. She takes my suggestion to teach her how to use it as a statement that she must start cutting the grass. She is so paranoid right now.
She is the group mom for our son's class and she sent an email out to all the parents about an upcoming event as school where parents can volunteer to help. I am already helping with my daughter's class in the morning and wanted to help with our son's class. I did not receive the signup email list, just the email from her that said she had sent out the signup list. I replied to all and said "i have not seen the signup list, did it already go out?". Verbatim. She sent me a text and blasted me for sending that to everyone. 30 minutes later another mom send her the same email. No apology from my wife.
I am just at step 8, but I know that step 10 is immediate amends. I would think that text qualifies for immediate amends. Not a big deal. It does worry me that she is not working her program and is destined to relapse. That worries me because of her level of drinking while she was drinking.
It is all so weird to get this much hate directed at me every day. I have never in my life had someone hate me this much for this long when I don't really see what I did that was this bad.
She also told me in an email today that I told the kids that it was her decision to get a divorce and that I would have liked to stay married. That was true then. It is not true now, I will correct that when I am with the kids next. But, she should tell them the truth that she does not want to be married to daddy anymore. Why not say that? It is a true statement. What would the other option be to tell them? Mommy wants her own house, just because. Crazy.
I just emailed her asking if I could speak to the kids on the phone at 6:30 pm instead of 7pm because I am meeting with my sponsor at 7 and then an Al Anon meeting at 8. I am sure that will cause a problem.
That is all for today, for now. I am sure there will be more later.