TennantSmith

I would cry too. It took more drinks to reach the point of not feeling, until that didn't happen either. I kept telling myself " this time will be different" it never was. I also did the "just ten more minutes. Then I won't drink" I always did.

I came here. I started an Accountability thread. I wrote out my plan and had others help me with it. Then I put my recovery into action. Is doesn't happen by itself. I wished for a sober fairy to come and sprinkle sober dust on me and I'd be fine. I focused on other goals and prayed sobriety would just happen as a by product.

It didn't. I couldn't reason, bargain, or white knuckle myself sober. I had to fight for it.

Check out the links at the top of the forum here on how people got sober and making a plan (I can't link from my phone). It really is a great starting point. It helps you know how to begin and what to do next.