View Single Post
Old 04-27-2015, 12:40 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
MissUs2015
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 104
What I'd do

Originally Posted by Somber2Sober View Post
Where is the line between...

- being a kind, supportive person to the addict & enabling the addict?
My esh: Enabling the addict is basically putting up with any behavior from your addict that you would not put up with in yourself or from anyone else. Emotional support toward your addict within those boundaries is kind, supportive behavior.

being compassionate to the addict & being compassionate to me?
As above. You come first. Whatever your addict says or does, you come first.

allowing the addict to share his suffering & keeping the distance for my own peace of mind?
As much as you need your own peace of mind, take it. In as much as we have f2f support (Alanon/Naranon), the addict can avail himself of NA or AA if he chooses to take the steps to channel his suffering toward recovery.

- doing things to improve myself & accepting me the way I am?
Nar-anon/al-anon are helpful. I go f2f and online. I'd recommend getting their readers and step-literature as well--reading them has been really healing when there's not a meeting.

The other thing that's been really healing for me is physical exercise with others. I got into CrossFit and a couple of sports leagues. That really, really helped.
....
MissUs2015 is offline