Copper and WV, I'm up for a while, too. I can stay up.
If I had a better memory, I would remember all the times I got depressed, nearly suicidal and angry when I have been drinking. TDG is right. Alcohol lies. I started sobriety 40 days ago and had a one-day slip 12 days ago. I felt like s&*t for a couple of days. I broke a toilet when I fell and I thought that addiction was going to be the death of me - that there was no reason for me to even try to get sober. A few days after, I somehow refused to be defeated by addiction.
I wish I had gone online here when I drank like you both did. I didn't have the guts or the wherewithal at the time to talk to the right people.The fact that you came to SR means a lot. I think it means you want to get better and you believe in yourself enough to try again.
WV, please give us an update as soon as you can.
Copper, I really know how you feel. When I drink, alcohol is irresistible - like I need it to survive. Can you stop drinking anymore tonight and stay up with us, too?