I’m new to the ACoA thing in the sense that I just started reading the Geringer Woititz book. When I look at the list (not sure if this one is the official Laundry List or was the building blocks of it), I find traits I don’t identify with. I know I don’t have to check off all the boxes to be part of this club, but it feels weird to me in a way.
I’ve listed below some of the ones that don’t ring true for me or at least have some kind of a spectrum (numbered as the traits are numbered in the book copy I have). I’d love to hear your thoughts about the traits you don’t identify with (if you don’t) and how that makes you feel. I can't post links yet (still new!
) but can maybe type up the full list in a bit if people need it for reference. Thanks!
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2. Adult children of alcoholics have difficulty following a project though from beginning to end. [It depends on the situation. Work responsibilities, no way. I’m on top of it. Personal projects, maybe.]
3. Adult children of alcoholics lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth. [No way. My wife and I joke that my nickname is Honest Abe. I’m not saying I never lie about anything ever, but lying doesn’t feel easy to me, so I don’t do it if the truth feels easy.]
5. Adult children of alcoholics have difficulty having fun. [I don’t know about this one. I’m still mulling it over. Maybe that means it’s true for me?]
13. Adult children of alcoholics are impulsive. They tend to lock themselves into a course of action without giving serious consideration to alternative behaviors or possible consequences. This impulsivity leads to confusion, self-loathing and loss of control over their environment. In addition, they spend an excessive amount of energy cleaning up the mess. [No way. Maybe I’ve got way other stuff working against this trait, like the super-responsibility thing, but I do not consider myself impulsive in the slightest or think anyone who knows me on any level would describe me as such. Locking myself into a course of action? Yes. Without serious consideration? No.]