Originally Posted by
amandaw 
I'm hoping my thought process changes over the next few months and my mind is in a better place.
Today I spent a lot of time sitting and thinking and crying - Feeling things that I haven't thought about for a long time. I don't want to be an alcoholic. That's for sure. However, I also don't want to not drink forever. I want to not have a drinking problem which I know is pretty close to impossible. I want to be normal. I'm mourning things that haven't happened yet.
In two months I will consider IOP. My doctor will probably force me into it because i told him I would, and I don't want to flake on my promises.
Hi.
Becoming and staying sober comes with wanting sobriety, being honest with our self about our drinking AND accepting we cannot drink in safety one day at a time in a row.
If any of those are missing it’s too wishy washy and usually ends in the miserable way of life drinking brings.
It used to be said a lot at meetings that if you don’t like sobriety your misery is refundable.
BE WELL