Wow, so sorry to read your story. I feel like I cannot give great advice since I am currently trying to figure things out with my AH situation, but I did want to write to say I can relate. My AH blames everything on me...no one is perfect like you said...but it sounds like she has bigger issues to deal with that you can't fix...it's not your job! Have you ever looked up Passive Aggressive? Sounds like she has some of those symptoms...silent treatments are not the way to resolve problems in a marriage. At least you are going to Al Anon and getting that support. My husband won't allow me to go...I know, very controlling...but I come here for the support. Keep posting and hope everything works out for you.