Hopedrive.....first of all.....WELCOME!!!!!!!
In addition to the advice you have already gotten.....
I would suggest 2 MAIN things:
1. Connect with support. Get some peeps behind you--people who have your back.
This can be in many forms. You already know about alanon. Yay. I HIGHLY suggest that you contact your local DV organization. There are many types of abuse--of which, verbal and emotional abuse qualifies. You don't have to be h it. They have many resources that can help you.....with finances..food card....housing....legal counseling...therapy....etc. They can also help you with making plans to leave.
Everything is confidential and you don't have to do anything that you don't want to.
Talking to a lawyer regarding your rights will be very helpful for you. Just gathering information is good--knowledge is power.
2. Start. quietly, making your plans..exploring your options...gathering information...and, getting yourself stronger and prepared.
In summary...Get support/Make a plan.
Millions of women before you have done the same....so can you!
dandylion