Oh god, I feel so much better after reading your post that is exactly like me. My lightbulb moment wasn't when I got drunk with my girlfriend at a quiet lunch while kids the kids were at school and then picked them up and drive them home or when i passed out while drinking alone while my kids ran around in the background. It wasn't even the other week when I smuggled a 6 pack into the cinemas and drank the lot watch a movie with my sober friend, but it was when I drank beers with some much larger older men (my husband and his friend) and I rounded them up twice. My husbands friend couldn't believe it. He was smashed, slurring his words and I was hardly tipsy and drank more than him. They were both so proud of me. I drank with pride when really I should be ashamed of myself. What self respecting mother of three drinks like a bogan?
I love it too mate. It's my best friend, I love the sound of a twist top, I love the smell, I love the feeling. Today is only day one and I have no idea how I'll go but I know I'm going down a dangerous road. Flirting with disaster and I will stop.
Stay in touch, we'll do it together x