Welcome Hopedrive. You will find many of us in the same boat. And, you will also read over and over again that you can't CAUSE, CONTROL OR CAUSE it. I don't have as much experience as others but I wanted to respond so you know you aren't alone. I know that blame game well. As for the kids, I have no experience but I'm sure someone here does. I do know that you will be just fine if you choose to leave. And shocker, he will still be an Alcoholic when you are gone so neither the family or he can blame you. Keep reading and posting you will learn a lot. Others will respond as well I'm sure. Puffy