Sounds like you know what you need to do.
That caregiver role can become a permanent fixture unless you change yourself.
I believe you should do what is in your own best interest here--
Maybe go NC and tell him you will talk to him after 6 mo-year of real sobriety
and mean it.
Whatever you choose, we will support you, however.
It sounds like you are done with this right now.
I get that as I am still depleted from caregiving my own alcoholic mother for many years.