Struggling and dreading tomorrow
Sorry not been about much. Generally things bit easier (a lot easier at times). Passed the 2 month mark which can't believe.
Tomorrow is going to be such a test tho.
My sister and myself are going to my parents. My daughters with her dad so be alone after. My sis is bringing wine as she always does. Doesn't drink much but will be having a glass. My mum has said same to her as my dad, that I was drinking a little more than I should, couple of glasses a night (really minimised it) and said I've decided to stop. She's happy not to have any but don't want to stop her and doesn't matter really if one or 10 ppl. It's the fact I'm going to be with someone drinking. Wound myself up so much and ended up crying on the phone to my mum earlier which I feel awful about but she totally understands. In one way think better for people to know whole truth but then in another way I don't. Just don't know what to do. I've slept most of today just trying to avoid thinking about tomorrow. Feel guilty then haven't spent much time with my girl which makes me want to drink more. Part of me just doesn't want to go tomorrow but I don't want to avoid it either because it's Mother's Day and will feel bad not going and have to do it eventually. Just exhausted from oversleeping and crying today and feel stupid for letting it affect me like this.