Just a PS in response to your later post, about "the future that could be."
I think all of us, but perhaps especially women, are conditioned almost from birth to believe in and dream about "what could be." Some day my prince will come. Kiss the right frog and he'll turn into a prince. See beyond the beast and love him, and he'll turn into a prince as well. It's everywhere - fairy tales, Disney, even 50 Shades of Grey.
It's a powerful fantasy. And it's noxious bullsh*t. There is a terrible difference between two equally evolved people bringing out the best in each other (because each one has done or is doing their own self-development work first), and one partner working and enduring and agonizing year after year hoping to realize the other's "potential."
But in the meantime, what happens to your potential? You only get one life. Carpe diem.