Yikes that sounds miserable. Unfortunately when there's been so much enabling, nothing changes if nothing changes. Are you putting a roof over her head? Feeding her? Is she not self sufficient as an adult which is what she is at 25? Your husband doesn't sound on board with making any changes. So let him deal with her and continue with the enabling and you leave with the dogs? Someone needs to change something and it sounds like that person is you at this time.