hi everyone,
James, I'm sorry you are feeling upset. when I originally got sober 10 years ago, I lived like that for a long time with my husband...constantly "waiting for me to fall" so he could catch me! I was TOLD that it will take time..much time...for him to trust me again. Him being suspicious was a consequence of my poor choices(sneaking, lying, screwing up my family, driving drunk with kids, etc, etc) and that I had to earn that trust back. I was Pissed!! here I was working hard to stay sober and HE was going to check on me?
I will say it did get better. ANd to his credit, everytime I have started and stopped drinking since then, he has been initially mad but more understanding and supportive.
I certainly get how you are feeling..stay strong. It takes time...