Thanks for the replies, the time to reply and the perspectives.. I'm realisibg that I just can't cope with too much.. Maybe I'm too sensitive haha dee your comment is very pertinent.
But a situation like last night is a difficult one.. A situation that I have no choice over.. The work had to be done. I was cold tired exhausted chest infection ( dealing with terminal parent and live wire toddler) and trying to get house sorted.. What to do in those situations.. I knew I couldn't do that work unless I rewarded myself and pushed through the fatigue and illness..
Maybe just pray for answers.. Feeling pretty down today. Anyway thankyou all SR means a lot to me